1. Take accountability for all the decisions that led to where your are right now.
This isn’t about blaming yourself or beating yourself up. It’s about EMPOWERING yourself and acknowledging that your past decisions have resulted in the life you’re living now- which means you can use the decisions you make now to create and shape your future. Our decisions create results. And if you don’t like the results you’ve achieved so far - all you have to do is start making different decisions. Different decisions mean different outcomes. And YOU get to decide what those outcomes will be.
2. Recognize that not all decisions will be easy or obvious and sometimes the “right” decision will mean have choose between the better of two bad options.
We’ve all heard the phrase “you always have a choice”. I’ve had it said to me more than once. And while that may true - we may not always have a good choice or any easy one for that matter. If you find yourself in a situation where you’re forced to choose between two less than desirable options, instead of focusing on how neither one is a “good” choice, try focusing on the fact that you're still making the best possible choice based on the information you have and the resources that are available to you at that time. By shifting your focus on what’s still within your control, you hold on to your power instead of giving it away to the situation.
3. Stop beating yourself up when things don’t work out as planned.
It’s easy to blame ourselves and let our inner critic leash its wrath on us when things don’t work out as we had hoped or planned. But beating yourself up over it isn’t going to change it- so why not use that energy in a more productive manner! Ask yourself powerful questions such as what have you learned from the situation and how you can use it to avoid being in similar situations in the future.
4. Change your inner dialogue.
One of my favorite phrases that I constantly repeat to myself is “as within, so without”. I repeat it to myself several times throughout the day as a reminder that our outer world is nothing more than a reflection of our inner world. And if my inner world is chaotic, self doubting and self defeating then my outer world will be too. Pay close attention to your thoughts and how they’re making you feel inside. If they are not making you feel good- change them. We are always only one thought away from a better day. People often tell me positive thoughts don’t do anything - I beg to differ. In my experience, a consistent stream of positive thoughts inspire you to keep going even when the going gets tough. And by staying on course in difficult times, you build strength and resilience. Resilience is critical to reclaiming your power. Because the fact is there are times when we all lose or give away or power. But those of us who are resilient will always fight to get it back.
5. Stop working so hard to please others and start pleasing yourself.
The only one who has to look you in the eye each morning and each night and decide if you’re satisfied is you. So put yourself first and start doing what matters most to you. By now we’ve all heard the phase you have to “put your own oxygen mask on first”..but hearing it, understanding it and actually doing it are all very different things. Without oxygen we all die- and each time you put your own needs behind those of others, you’re basically giving them your oxygen mask. and killing off a part of yourself Take the mask back. And in the process, you’ll take your power back.
Ready to live your best life?
Book a coaching session | Join my email list for random insights | Drop by my Instagram @afsheenshah and say Hi!